I love affection. Why don't be engage in it more? Why not just, you know, put your head on a stranger's shoulder on the plane? When you're sleepy and you need a place to rest? I don't see what's so wrong with that. Maybe we'd get along better if we knew how to touch each other in a platonic manner, just admiring the skin and muscle of human life. Skin is gorgeous. I love feeling skin, and I love seeing someone's hand resting on me, moving a bit now and then, and I can see the little hairs and the shine on their nails a bit, they could tap out a beat or warm themselves, I don't care. It's weird to think that I'll be 20 years old in three and a half months. As I approach that age, I'm remembering more and more of my childhood. Little things I said that I think are cute, and at the time I felt like the smartest person on earth. I love interacting with children now. I feel like I really am leaving that phase, and it's bittersweet. I hear ages 20-29 are particularly challenging. I found 13-19 to be horrible at times. Teenage years. I'm proud I made it out of my teens alive. How the fuck did I survive? I think I died a bit on the inside for a while there, but now I'm back. I learned a lot. Beauty does not come from God. That's probably the best thing I ever learned, because it gave me more hope than anything else. I have seen people grow, and I have seen some people stay stagnant. How horribly boring, to wake up and want to be the same person each day, on the same trajectory. I want rapids, white foam in my rivers, stones to leave bruises on my knees. I want to wake up and be a new person every day, live a new life every day. I need to be everything at least once before I'm gone.
Here's the tattoos I want.
I want a solar system tattoo on either my ankle or ribcage, the golden ratio on my ribcage, left sleeve of trees and cityscape perhaps (austin...Trees... Universe), and a bold, dark circle on my right wrist filled in with an intricate portrait of the night sky/outer space.
This is what I want on my ribcage. Fuckin ace!!
Okay well perhaps it is time to study and whatnot.
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