Benji.
Tomorrow (today), I want to dress nicely. I want to look nice and like I take myself seriously. I want to go to all my classes and learn some stuff. I want to spend my breaks studying or reading, because, you know, that's what I pay to do. I want to have a good, relaxing day. No anxiety. I want to finish Diary and start Invisible Monsters. I want to read again. I always go back to that, reading. I wish I had a chunk of time to head on down to the Austin History Center this weekend. Maybe I do. So I will do all this. Do my linguistics reading throughout the day, read some Palahnuik, watch medicinal chemistry videos. I realize that I once was pretty bright and ahead of the curve. Not anymore. Now I'm just average at best, and it's starting to get embarrassing, this fall from academic grace. I compete with myself, and I'm losing. So fuck depression and feeling bad about yourself. Fuck that. Just do your fucking work.
Hello, Seattle.
I am an albatross.
What Do You Want To Know?
- grey.skies.dark.lies
- I decided this "About Me" needed an update. I am not the same person I was 2 years ago. I'm not the same person I was 2 days ago, in fact. The person I am now? I love math. Shamelessly. If math were a person, I would kill to be his loving wife. I love food, on and off. Some days I wake up with a pure hate for food, some days we are the best of friends down in my belly. I am weird, and the concept of being "normal" is abhorrent and repulsive. I like big words that no one uses, like dodtrantal. It means "nine inches in length." Just a fact. I am a lazy student, but I have a master plan to become valedictorian and attend an Ivy League school. Somehow. I adore adore adore Regina Spektor and about a million other bands. I love strangers because I love to hear their stories and life information. I love sharing my stories and life information. I basically have a tepid yet fervent relationship with life that I am quite content with. Now, all of this will change within a week; I guarantee.
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