No One's Gonna Love You

No one's gonna love you more than I do.

I don't know what the future holds. I don't know where we'll be in 4 to 7 years. That's a long stretch of time to think about for having only known each other for a few months. It's pretty crazy, isn't it? But nothing worth having ever really makes sense. All I know is that I am happier than ever when I get the chance to see you or talk to you. I am happier than ever just knowing that you're in my life. You are here now, and there's going to be really hard times ahead I know. It's going to be so hard, missing you so much. It's going to make it hard to focus, so I may have to let you go a bit. But I hope that our time apart can make us grow as individuals so that when we finally and hopefully do get to be together, we are stronger and better for it. Is it crazy that I can see a long road ahead of us? The reason I can is because we are both reasonable. I trust you, and I try to trust you. I trust that you won't throw me away; please know that I won't. Even when the days come when I want to, I won't. I'll check myself and keep you close. I don't want to ruin anything with you, ever. I'm going to look at my last relationship and see what went wrong, and I'm going to do my best to make sure that never happens with us. You make me excited for the future. I used to look at the future as something awful, something I had to fill with dead space and time, something I had to endure. Now it seems instead to be something extremely fragile and beautiful.
I am glad our families can be friends. That makes me so happy! I am happy that your sister likes me, and maybe even your other siblings. And your parents. I hope they like me too. I like them all. I will remember everything from this summer, every moment I spent with you. Each one was amazing. The first time you held me, it felt like it'd been that way for so much longer, but neither of us knew. The first time you held my hand, I felt like it wasn't the first time, but like it was something so natural that had been happening for a long time. The first time you kissed my head and we sat there together, I felt safe. If I think about it too much, I begin to cry. Not because I'm sad (though I am very sad to leave you; but I will be back!) but because I have never been happier. This is going to be hard, it's crazy, we may be crazy too, but hey, it's okay! I have horrible patience, but I will work on it for you. I will do anything for you, really. As long as it makes you happy and okay and safe. -Bianca